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| Mended (Dictionary.com): To make (something broken, worn, torn, or otherwise damaged) whole, sound, or usable by repairing: to progress back towards recovery. |
I think of you... Do you think of me?
I miss you... Do you miss me?
If only I could be with you... Do you want to be with me?
In my day, I heard your voice but it didn’t resonate with the person I knew. I heard your voice and it wasn’t the love I’ve known. I heard your voice... happiness in it. I heard your voice... a friends voice is it?
Your attention isn’t the same. Your time for me has gone away. Your embrace I no longer feel. Your face I no longer see.
When I’m before you it’s awkward. Before you it’s cold. Before you, I want to grab hold of you, but I won’t be so bold.
The opportunity was before me. The opportunity to be with you. Your voice said I’m in this with you, but my voice didn’t say the same to you.
You say “I do this only because I love you!” I know this, but inside I faint to respond back confidently the same to you.
You are there... And I am here.
I say to myself, if only you would reach out to me. If only I received word. If only I could hear that voice I know. If only I knew.
You were there for me, but I failed to be there too. You are still there for me... But, I hear a voice say, ‘you sure that’s true?’
How can I reach out to you? I reach out to you in here.
I know my words will be seen, and they are in my heart to be heard.
I feel so overwhelmed to be someone I don’t know.
I am scared but I know I’m not supposed to.
Will my tardiness in becoming who I’m supposed to be, have you taken away from me?
You are such a short distance away, and I want to run to you.
You are a quick call away, and yet I can’t seem to find my voice.
You’re close enough to touch, and yet I dare not to.
I don’t want to get consumed by a lie, but I only ask you to be here for me.
I need to take action; I want to take action, but I freeze up in fear.
You tell me “I believe in you” but I say, “I don’t believe in myself.”
You repeat I believe in you! If only my actions made that true.
You say again, I believe in you! This should motivate me to believe in myself.
You’ve said, I believe in you! Please help me to believe in myself.
You believe in me... And I believe in you.
I don’t want to believe the lie, because I want to believe the truth.
I believe (in my head), but help me with my unbelief (in my heart).
Beloved, I can only share with you what I know, have gone through or witnessed myself. In this time I’m struggling like I’ve never struggled before. I feel the choke hold of my enemy unlike before. My dreams are fading away, my relationship (from my end) is falling apart.
I wrote this, because I know we all can struggle in relationships and in our RELATIONSHIP with God.
Today I was reminded that God is near to us, we are dear to Him, He loves us, stands up for us, and will protect us. As I said I was reminded of that, but I know many of us know this in our mind, but fail to grasp it and live freely with it firmly planted in our hearts.
I also know many times, we experience such weakness that we don’t find the strength to do anything. But I believe, that when we experience that, we can call on God to strengthen us. We can call on God to help us. We can call on God to protect us. We can call on God to guide us. We can call on God to revive us, refresh us, to deliver us, and give us a new sense of purpose that leads to hope and a future.
The Word of God tells us, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
Just now, this verse in Scripture spoke to me in a whole new way. It opened up to me that saving, isn’t for a time to come later, but saving is for a time like NOW!
If we call on the Lord Jesus, we can be saved from our thoughts, from our actions... From our unbelief.
I wrote this because I know we can all be tricked into believing a lie. Although we want to be mighty men/women, we are susceptible to trickery; to lies.
So let us place our trust in God, not only for what we don’t know, but for what we know. Let us trust in God, not only for what we can’t do, but also for what we can do.
Let us not listen to the lie that doesn’t allow us to move forward because of what we did in the past, or those who said we couldn’t, or those who have experienced us failing. God is faithful and just!
Here is a seed of hope, of faith and love; a powerful promise from God, that I know we all need to have planted firmly in our hearts as well as our minds:
“If we confess our sins, he (God) is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9 NIV emphasis added)
Sin, is simply missing the mark. Whatever promises and dreams we all have left behind, forgotten, gave up on, abandoned, stop believing God would get us to that dream; that promise.
Let us as the verse in scripture above invites us to do, confess it (whatever that may be) to God, and allow the moment of forgiveness and the process of rightly living again in God’s grace, to see our dreams and God’s promises, start to come to life in us all over again.
Beloved, I believe that when I was strong, God used my testimony to help you see He is strong. And I believe that as I am weak now, His testimony will help us all become strong again. Amen.
Here’s Jesus’ testimony to strengthen us all:
“Looking (gazing) unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured (pushed pass the pain) the cross, despising (disregarding) the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God (obtaining the promise).” (Hebrews 12:2 NKJV emphasis added)
Beloved, I have to believe that all we do in this life isn’t by accident, and if that is true, then God dying on a Cross then we can live free isn’ by accident either. God knows our weakness, yet He still loves us. Let us live right in the light of His glory. Amen.
As always... YOU ARE LOVED.
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