This phrase I have been hearing lately more and more concerning relationships, and this morning the Lord placed it into my heart to speak on the matter as He will shed light. Beloved, we are all called by God to do something of great significance and although everyone will not share the same enthusiasm or calling we do, that doesn’t mean those relationships are not birthed and ordained by God. You may not have the same calling, ministry, talents, gifts, skills or background but as long as you are heading towards the same direction; that is Jesus— You are on the right path. Amen.
Let’s begin by defining this phrase, “ungodly soul ties.”
Ungodly (defined by dictionary.com): not accepting God or a particular religious doctrine; irreligious; atheistic.
Soul (defined by dictionary.com): The principle of life, feeling, thought, and action in humans, regarded as a distinct entity separate from the body, and commonly held to be separable in existence from the body; the spiritual part of humans as distinct from the physical part.
God; the divine source of all identity and individuality.
Ties (dictionary.com): to bind, make a connection or join closely or firmly.
By the above definitions, If you bring them all together, an “ungodly soul tie” is any attempt of a connection or bond to bind closely together without involving God; apart from God’s will, His design, based on a human beings rationalization, thoughts, emotions and actions leading them further away from God who is their identity; their source of all things, and closer to defining their own identity and inevitably making something or someone else their god.
Beloved, let’s get right into the matter at hand— relationships. All relationships are bonded together through common purpose and emotional connection. That is, where does the couple see themselves now and for the future and will there be a mutual willingness to remain faithful to one another throughout the good and bad. Sickness and health. Through richer or poorer. To death parts them.
Now that “ungodly soul ties” have been defined and the purpose of relationships have also been defined; that is “Godly Soulties,” let us go on this journey together in the Book of Genesis where we see a clear and concise example of “ungodly soul ties.”
In Genesis 29:1-35 we see a man named Jacob (son of Isaac which is the son of Abraham) and Jacob literally has the meaning “supplanter,” which is translated “strategic schemer.” But to get a greater grasp of who Jacob is and how such ungodly soul ties come to be in his life and the life of his future wives, we must read from (Genesis 25:19-34 through Genesis 26, 27, 28, 29), where we see the development of such ungodly soul ties and how they do not materialize over night but are seeds that are planted and grow stronger and stronger the more we tend to them.
Jacob at the request of his mother (Rebekah— see Genesis 27: 46; Genesis 28:1-2) is sent away to a land where her brother Laban lived and there Jacob was to marry one of Laban’s daughters.
Laban’s daughters were named (Leah and Rachel— see Genesis 29:16), but Jacob loved Rachel (see Genesis 29:18).
Beloved, here’s where the ungodly soul ties begin in the life of Jacob concerning relationships with the opposite sex. Jacob, as mentioned loved Rachel but the backdrop of the story is, in the land where Laban lived it was customary to marry off the oldest daughter first (being Leah). So due to Jacob’s scheming and trickery in his life, such things came to him as well, as Laban tricked him into marrying Leah and consummating their marriage together.
To say the least, Jacob wasn’t well with this, but he persisted and did what he had to do, in order to marry Rachel the object of his affection. Eventually he married Rachel and they consummated their marriage to one another as well, but now there was friction between both sisters and their one shared husband.
One after another, Leah and Rachel fought over attention from Jacob in giving them children, and one after another they missed the fact that God was the source of their blessings and not Jacob or their selves. A pattern is developing on the behalf of Jacob and how his scheming ways caught up with him and started to involve and become part of his marriage with two sisters.
We can always point the finger at others or say “why me?” But history proves it over and over, it’s the life lived in “as I do, you do,” whether for the good or bad as in Jacob’s life, that dictates the way others will respond to you and inevitably act as well.
I intentionally showed the ungodly soul tie from a man’s perspective, but now here’s the woman’s perspective in that I will share how Leah the oldest daughter had her own ungodly soul tie with her very own husband.
In Genesis 29:31-35 we see how Leah continually tried to find favor with Jacob her husband; trying to please him, with giving him children although she knew that he loved Rachel.
Leah was blessed by the Lord to have children as He saw that she was unloved and her first child was a son. She named him Reuben which literally means “See, a Son.” Here’s Leah exact words, about such a blessing in her life, “The Lord has surely looked on my affliction. Now therefore, my husband will love me” (Genesis 29:32).
—> Last sentence of the above verse ‘Now therefore, my husband will love me’ shows Leah had the wrong intentions. It wasn’t being fulfilled in finding favor with the Lord, it was getting Jacob to finally love her.
Leah was able to see that her blessing came from the Lord, but that wasn’t her greatest concern, it was finding favor in her husbands eyes. She wasn’t able to see that she had found favor in the Lord’s eyes and her fulfillment came from the Lord alone and not Jacob.
If Leah wasn’t already blessed, she conceived again and had another son and named him Simeon which literally means “Heard” as Leah said, “Because the Lord has heard I am unloved, He has therefore given me this son also.”
Leah was blessed again and conceived another son and named him Levi which literally means “Attached” in that Leah said, “Now this time my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” Leah is still following the wrong intentions... She is still holding onto ungodly soul ties. But a change is coming and this hurtful and hazardous bond will be broken!
The Lord blessed Leah again and she conceived a fourth son and named him Judah which literally means “Praise” in that Leah finally realized her fulfillment was from the Lord and that she found favor in his eyes therefore she praised the Lord in that she said, “Now I will praise the Lord.” Once Leah severed that wrong intention; her ungodly soul tie, she stopped bearing children. Praise the Lord!
Beloved, ungodly soul ties aren’t necessarily with an actual individual, but by Jacob and Leah’s life, we see that ungodly soul ties are solely based on our actions and intentions.
You may find yourself in a relationship that you believe to be an “ungodly soul tie” but you have the ability to see the blessing and favor God can bring into it and out of it, and further choose to see that you have favor with the Lord, and not strive and strive to find favor with the person.
Here’s one final insight and wisdom from God. If you get involved with someone and from the start they do not love you but their love is to another, it will save you a whole lot of heartache and pain if you don’t pursue that relationship any further, but if you do find yourself in a marriage and either man or woman doesn’t love you, look to God and He will bring fulfillment in that marriage and you won’t have to wear yourself thin trying to win over their affection. Amen.
Let us pray:
Lord, You alone give fulfillment and purpose to all. You alone know the hearts and minds of all and You alone, are compassionate to our sorrows knowing exactly what we need. We confess that we easily find ourselves in ungodly soul ties and much of the time we are unwilling to acknowledge that you are our source of comfort and favor. Thank you for your untiring willingness to show us our misguided ways, and to teach us of yours. I pray, you will give us sight to our blind ways then we can sever our wrong intentions that create these ungodly soul ties, and lead us back to that place where we no longer look to find favor in the eyes of others, but solely, praise you. Bless your holy name. Amen.